Dealing with Loved Ones

If you believe that someone you love is doing something that will bring them serious harm, what do you do? You recognize, assuming they are adult, their absolute right of self-determination. You recognize their beliefs don’t align with your own. For that matter, an ever-growing number of peoples’ opinions on the matter don’t even come close to yours. They used to. But, not these days. Your way of looking at it is deemed outdated and old fashioned at best. We’ll leave less charitable assessments for later. Still, you don’t see it ending well. You even recognize that you are looking much further down the road than they have even considered; perhaps further than your loved-one may think matters. Do you mind your own business? How convinced are you of a negative outcome? How negative to you think the outcome is likely to be? How permanent? You know from observation that the other is highly invested in the track they are on. You know from past experience that effective persuasion on the subject is mostly already countered by a made-up mind. You easily understand how convictions work; you have your own. So, what do you do?


2 Responses to “Dealing with Loved Ones”

  1. DM Says:

    you’ve just touched on some of the angst of the last 10 years of my life. We had 4 prodigal children @ one point…doing some heavy duty stuff. No easy answers from this corner. DM

  2. Durable Says:

    Interesting question. My advise is to “speak the truth in love”. First, make sure you have the relational right to speak into the person’s life. When you do, choose an appropriate time and venue to have a conversation that will cash in whatever chips you have earned relationally. Once you have had that conversation, you affirm your respect for their right to choose how to live their life. And then you practice self control and prayer and remind yourself that God gave everyone since Adam the right to be wrong.

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